Why Gratitude is the Attitude

At any given moment, our eyes take in thousands of pieces of visual information which our brain only processes a fraction of. Therefore it is safe to say that what we mentally focus on defines what we ‘see’. This is how two people in the same place can have two completely different experiences. Take London for example…A tourist roaming the streets of London may see it as a vibrant, buzzing city, full of beauty and culture. Conversely, a homeless man living on the streets of London may see it as a dark and dangerous place, full of crime and suffering. Both people are in the exact same city, but their perception of reality is worlds apart. Their outer worlds are merely a reflection of their inner mind which selectively decides what they ‘see’ based on their belief systems and past experiences.

The truth is there is an infinite possibility of realities. We can consciously choose which reality we want to live in by adjusting what we focus on seeing. People living in some of the poorest parts of the world can live joyful lives, simply because they choose to focus more on what they have rather than what they lack. It’s also why celebrities with all the fame and material riches in the world can still be susceptible to deep depression and suicide. Heaven and hell aren’t distant lands that we go to after we die, heaven and hell are right here on this earth depending on what we choose to focus on.

I read an amazing caption once along the lines of: ‘When you look in the mirror, you cannot make your reflection smile by reaching out and touching the mirror. You, yourself, must first smile, and only then will your reflection automatically smile back’.

This is a powerful metaphor for the control we have of our outer world. If we want a life full of blessings and abundance, we must first adjust our vision to see blessings and abundance in every situation. Only then will our reality shift to reflect it. We will experience more abundance of money, relationships, blessings, opportunities...they will all come flooding to us.

So how do we adjust our vision?

Well this is where gratitude practice comes in.

Gratitude practice calibrates the lens through which we see reality. Practising gratitude on a daily basis trains our brain to constantly ‘see’ abundance in our lives, instead of focusing on what’s lacking. That’s not to say we aren’t allowed to desire things we don’t have, but we stop living in a space of craving and desperation. We stop looking outwards and into the future for salvation, for completion. We stop falling for the age old trick of ‘I’ll be happy when…’. Gratitude is all about finding happiness in the present by realising how bountiful our lives are.

Gratitude can be practised first thing in the morning to set the tone for your day. Alternatively, it can be done last thing as night as a reflection of your day. Keep a notebook specifically for this practice.

Write down a list of all the things you are grateful for.

• Start with the obvious things like good health, having a roof over your head, having such wonderful family and friends etc.

• Then move on to the smaller things; that delicious hot chocolate you had, the fact that it’s almost the weekend.

• Finally move on to things that might not seem like you should be thankful for. Thank you for my cold as it reminds me to appreciate how good it is when I am healthy. Thank you for the job interview I failed because I know what to do differently next time.

As you write each thing down, take a moment to feel genuine gratitude for it before moving on to the next one. If you are struggling to muster up the feeling, listen to a music track that puts you in a happy mood beforehand to tap into that joyful energy.

You may not feel any different on the first day, or even the first week. But by the end of the 2nd week you will start noticing a difference in the world around you. By the end of the third week you will notice an even greater shift. Harvard psychology lecturer Shawn Achor says that practising gratitude for 21 days in a row creates pathways in the brain which make it automatically scan the world for the positives before the negatives. This practice really does retrain your brain. As your inner vision changes, soon your reality will shift to reflect it and you will encounter more blessings, more opportunities and more things to be grateful for.

To conclude, gratitude is most definitely the attitude if we want to live ‘a glass half full’ kind of life. As we consciously retrain our mind to experience abundance, our external reality will soon follow suit. But don’t take my word for it, try it for yourself and see if it works for you!

Miri x